I don't believe in "diets" because I think they are unhealthy and unrealistic. I do believe in a healthy lifestyle that involves exercise and healthy eating. For the last ten months I have exercised three to six times a week and made major improvements in the way we eat. While I feel healthier I have still been very frustrated with my appearance and have found myself to vocally complain to my husband about my body and weight in front of my boys. This is wrong! So, I've been thinking a lot about ways that I can show my boys, and eventually my girls if we have some, how to appreciate the bodies they have. I want them to hear me speak positively about my appearance and about the way I feel. I want them to also know that it is important to live a healthy lifestyle--one that includes exercise and healthy eating. I also want them to know that we are all created with different bodies and it's ok if we don't look like the next person.
I gleaned some good advice from a few different articles. One article pointed out that you first have to have a positive image of your own body. They say to ask yourself the following (my answers are off to the side):
Do I like my own body? I don't like how it looks but I am grateful for a body that works so well.
Do I keep negative feelings about my body to myself, rather than voicing them to others (especially my daughter)? No.
Am I satisfied with the way I look in clothes? No.
Do I diet frequently, and/or does my weight yo-yo up and down? No.
The article goes on to say:
Don’t talk negatively about your own body.
Try not to lose or gain weight dramatically, and don’t utilize fad diets.
Model healthy exercise behavior
Refrain from discussing your weight with your daughter.
Try not to hide your body from your daughter. I don't agree with walking around naked or in just your underwear so I don't agree with this one. I do think it's ok to wear swimming suits in front of your kids though.
Don’t criticize her clothes—even if you hate them! I think the exception to this is when the clothes are inappropriate or immodest.
Don’t be the food police
Encourage exercise of all kinds
Examine family eating habits
Don’t compare
The other article that I really enjoyed recommended that we make healthy choices about food and exercise. Get enough exercise to keep your body healthy. It said that we can educate ourselves about nutrition and how to read food labels to make the best choices. We should eat more breads, cereals, vegetables and fruits, and eat less junk food and fatty food. I think part of educating ourselves about nutrition is knowing what things are appropriate for our personal body type. Obviously, someone with diabetes (or someone with a family history of diabetes) needs to make different food choices than someone else.
Finally, rather than focusing on what your body looks like, focus on what your body does for you. I want to be able to apply all this advice to my life. I think, just like every new habit, that it is going to take a lot of time before it becomes something that happens automatically but eventually I will be able to do it.
http://www.loveourchildrenusa.org/parent_teachgirlselfesteem.php
http://www.radiancemagazine.com/kids_project/girls_body.html
http://www.focusas.com/BodyImage.html
2 comments:
hi Adrianne. i've looked at this blog a few times; glad to see you writing on it more.
couldn't agree more with this post. i used to complain about being fat until i heard avery say it about herself one day. big OOPS. so now i talk about being healthy. mom needs to go to the gym to be healthy. we don't want to eat too much ice cream because we don't want to be unhealthy.
a healthy body image is probably almost as important as a testimony to give to a girl. eating disorders can be so destructive!
i think it also goes along with modesty. you gotta teach it young and consistent and always because Heavenly Father made our bodies and He wouldn't make anything that is not beautiful and everything we wear or do or eat (except brownies) should show Him how appreciative we are of it.
It was interesting for me to read the articles and see that they all said that to help girls (and boys) have a good body image, they need to be taught to appreciate all the things your body can do and that they need to understand the importance of exercise and eating right. Whew, long sentence. It makes sense but I never thought of it that way. You want your girls to be healthy so you focus on a healthy lifestyle but don't focus on what their body looks like. Anyway, I really have to master this.
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